• Bianca Gallery

The Joy of Car Rides

When I was younger, my mom would have a habit of taking me on car rides when we needed to talk. Having two bothers in the house made it hard sometimes to have a deep conversation without being interrupted. I recently found out her other reason for putting me in the car, "You couldn't escape," is what she said. I responded, "I never felt the need to." This of course made her feel much better about her decision. I elaborated, telling her that the car was the only other place where I felt free. Where I was calm, watching the world go by, having the window down. I never felt pressured to open up, though I did more easily being away from the house. I cried a lot in the car, mom cried with me sometimes. She wasn't an overly affectionate person, sometimes having a hard time displaying it. In those car rides, she would hold my hand as we had tears run down our cheeks. Even now thinking about it, I have to stop my tears from scattering on the keyboard.

The car has always been my therapy center. Where I talk out loud to myself(totally healthy by the way). I cry there a lot too. Even when I know everyone can see me balling as I look like I'm trying to keep it together. Before all the emotional stuff, the car was the best way for me to fall asleep. I was that kid that slept hard. I mean my parents would tell me how I passed out at home and we all went to China Town in Chicago, Illinois for dinner, I slept all the way there, in the restaurant, and all the way home. Never experienced any of it. I have also slept through a water spout thrashing up my neighborhood. We were okay, but everyone else was awake...hard sleeper I tell you.

In the car, not only does it calm my body from all the buzzing of being on the road, it also calms my mind that's always racing with every single thing under the sun. The intrusive thoughts, the what ifs are a thing of the past. Nothing else matters when you are taking a car ride.

2 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All